


Resurrection

by wordstothewisereaders



Category: Supernatural
Genre: F/M, SPN - Freeform, SPN fluff, Some angst, Supernatural - Freeform, castiel x reader - Freeform, part 2 of Fallen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-03
Updated: 2017-02-03
Packaged: 2018-09-21 16:18:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,052
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9556883
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wordstothewisereaders/pseuds/wordstothewisereaders
Summary: Recuperation from a horrendous event can be brutal. Will Cas be able to recover fully from the removal of his wings, and will human life be easy? Castiel will discover the answers as he learns about the ups and downs of mortality.





	

**Author's Note:**

> This is part 2 of my Cas fic Fallen. It can be read as a stand alone. Cas does have PTSD in this so read with caution! Thanks so much!!

Mortality. It started as a major pain in the ass for Castiel. There were so many new feelings to experience and things to learn that he couldn't keep up for the first month. As time passed, it began to grow on him. The fallen angel began to enjoy the little aspects of life that he would have never been able to enjoy in his powerful state. Sleeping quickly became one of Cas' favorite things to do, and he could almost always be seen with a small bag of gummy bears or chips in his hand when there was nothing else to be done in the bunker. 

The biggest advancement of Cas' life had been healing both his physical wounds and mental inhibition. Cas' wings had been ripped from his body almost two months before in an event that he was still uncomfortable talking about. The incident had left two large, deep gashes where Cas' shoulder blades were. They were healing well, better than expected, although he would have terrible scars there the rest of his life. The injury had caused him pain beyond that of human perception, and, while it outwardly affected his physical well-being, his mind suffered just as much. He began to lose confidence in himself and developed anxiety and what Sam believed to be depression. It was simply that he felt as if he was not good enough to be around Sam or Dean or you anymore because he could no longer help in the ways he was used to. He believed he was nothing but a shell of his former self. 

Although there were rough spells with the fallen angel, there was an ever-present light in the darkness. Besides food and sleep and life's generally enjoyable little things, you were, in his opinion, the best thing that he ever had. Your relationship with Cas had developed nicely over time. You helped him adjust by teaching him everything you could, and what you couldn't you learned together. Whenever he was having a rough day you would sit with him in silence, your presence much more powerful than words. On good nights, he would pull you outside to gaze at the stars and tell you the story behind them. You were the perfect team that was slowly building as wonderful a life as any hunters' could have together.

***

Rain beat down hard on outside of the bunker. The sound that you found to be soothing could easily be heard from any of the various rooms. You sat curled up in your bed, a book in hand, enjoying some down time that was so rare these days. You had no idea where your boyfriend was, probably forcing Dean to watch one of the Animal Planet documentaries with him that he loved so much.

The comforting sound of the rain soon got into your head. Before you knew it, you were slipping a random scrap of paper into your book. Your eyelids felt heavy and you drifted off into one of the best naps you'd had in a long time.

Cas sat wearily on the couch, not enjoying the loud noise coming from outside. He knew it was rain and that the fear was irrational, but it still didn't set right with him. He pulled his blanket tighter around his shoulders, liking the comfort of the pressure. Dean had left him to make a food run and Sam was studying up on lore relevant to a potential case on the other side of Kansas. He tried to return his focus back to the program about bees playing on the tv but couldn't quite shake his uneasiness. That's when it began to thunder.

A loud crash from the sky almost rattled the bunker. Cas jumped before flinching. He tried to calm himself. The naturally loud noise sounded so much like that of his surroundings when he'd had his wings torn out. He recalled the terrible beating painfully and rolled his shoulders. They were close to healed though the scars were prominent. 

Another boom jolted Cas, and he got up, making his way to your room. He crossed the bunker in record time and knocked softly on your door. He heard a faint reply from you before he stepped in, blanket still strewn across his shoulders. 

"Hey," you said, smiling and rubbing the sleep from your eyes. 

Your smile soon faded when you saw the distress on your boyfriend's face. "What's wrong?" you asked, preparing yourself as you had so many times.

Before he could respond, one more crash of thunder echoed through the room. Cas flinched again. You patted the portion of the bed beside you, lifting up the covers for him to join you. He climbed in with you, scooting close so that your arms were touching. You turned to your side, taking one of his hands. 

"Tell me." you said, rubbing your thumb in circles on the back of his hand.

"It sounds just like..." he replied, trailing off.

You needed no further explanation. You pulled Cas close to you, and he buried his face in your neck. You breathed in the scent of him that was an odd combination of cinnamon and something that smelled clean. You could feel his breath hit your neck each time he exhaled, and you shivered from the contact. Cas sat back, sliding down in your bed and pulling you along with him. His arms engulfed you and dragged you to him. He was warm and comfortable. You rested your head on his chest, throwing an arm around his torso, and listened to his unusually fast heartbeat. 

"Thank you for this." he whispered sleepily, drifting away with you into a calming sleep.

***

Two weeks later, the aspects of daily human life became routine for Cas. He had learned all of the basics along with bits and pieces of information that came with time. Sleep remained a constant favorite of his and it was made even better by you accompanying him. 

Tonight was no different. Cas sunk into bed wearing sweatpants and a long sleeve navy shirt that showed off all of his muscles. You soon followed and snuggled into his chest. He threw an arm around you, now more comfortable with contact as things progressed, and pulled you into him. Cas nuzzled his nose into your neck and you smiled.

"Goodnight, Cas." you whispered.

"Goodnight, Y/N." he replied sleepily , already halfway gone.

You woke suddenly in the middle of the night to sporadic movement on the other side of the bed. You rolled over, looking at the still sleeping Castiel toss and turn. He made quiet noises every once and awhile. You watched him carefully, noticing him wincing periodically. Before long, he was speaking in bits and pieces.

"No...please." he mumbled, rolling over.

It continued for a moment before he seemed to become more disturbed. You placed a hand on his shoulder, jostling him slightly. He didn't react, so you sat up and took his face in your hands, whispering to him. After a moment of stillness, Cas' eyes shot open and he looked around frantically. You smoothed back his hair gently.

"Shh...shhh. It's okay. You're safe." you said.

He quickly realized where he was and what had happened. In a flash, he had pulled you down and held you tightly to his chest. His breathing was heavy and you could feel the sweat that was appearing on his skin. Your head rested over his heart and you could hear it beating rapidly. 

"I'm sorry." he whispered into your ear.

"What for?" you asked, clearly confused.

"They had you. I let them. I'm so sorry, Y/N." Cas said, and you could sense how shaken he was.

"It's okay. I promise you it's okay. We're both fine." you said, rubbing your hand up and down his back slowly.

Cas didn't respond. He only pulled you even closer and buried his face in your hair. He sighed, still reliving whatever he had seen. 

He held onto you for several hours.

"Go back to sleep, Cas." you said softly.

"But what about the nightmares?" he scaredly asked.

"I'll be right here. I'll fight them off." you responed.

Although he was not completely satisfied with your answer, Cas did not say another word and soon drifted back to sleep. He didn't wake again until morning, and you never left his warm embrace.

***

Months passed with little to do. You worked small cases with the boys scattered across the country, yet nothing catastrophic arose. It was the first time in years that you didn't have to chase after Lucifer or deal with the corruptness of a powerful being. It was almost nice. It reached the point where you got to call the bunker home for more than a few days at a time. Dean set into a nesting period and took about a week where he cleaned the entire place top to bottom willingly. Sam had settled into research, reading anything he could get his hands on for the sake of gaining personal knowledge. Cas had discovered more of the wonders of Netflix along with more modern books. He made his way through the world of pop culture fairly quickly with some assistance. You had done a little bit of everything: reading, drawing and even learning a new language.

Time did not have boundaries and each day was lived to its fullest now. Your and Cas' relationship had reached its peak. He was taking you on surprise dates every now and again, and you were helping him explore the world. Downtime was more enjoyable than ever. Most of your spare moments were spent together, whether it included books or food or just cuddling. Those were your favorite times.

Today just so happened to be one of your days off. The boys and you had just returned from a rougaro hunt in the south tip of Maine. Sam had done exceptionally well on research, so the team was in and out in less than a week. You were sitting on the bed with Cas at your side, his hand intertwined with your. The covers were strewn over you. A book was in his lap, and he was thumbing through the pages with his free hand. It was Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, your favorite of the series. You had convinced him to read all seven books after gushing over a new fan theory you had seen on the internet. He had made it through the first four books quickly and was now halfway through the fifth. The previous ones he had read by himself, but you had insisted that this one you read together. Cas had spent all of his free nights reading aloud with you.

"'We've all got both light and dark inside us. What matters is the part we choose to act on. That's who we really are.'" Cas read, pausing at all of the right moments.

He stopped after that line, studying it again. He grinned half-heartedly.

"I like that. Like it is saying that we can't harness what is within us, but we can control what we do with it." he said thoughtfully.

You smiled sleepily at his wisdom. "Mhmm." you hummed in reply.

Cas turned his attention to you, gazing down at you resting against his shoulder. The corners of his mouth lifted up once again, and he placed a bookmark in your book and put it on the nightstand. He moved you both until you were laying down and wrapped his other arm around you. You spent the next two hours enjoying each other's company, hardly speaking.

Cas kissed you lazily, slowly making his way from your temple to your lips. You leaned into his contact and kissed back when you could. 

"I love you, Y/N." he whispered between kisses.

Your heart stopped momentarily. That was the first time he had said it. Damn did it feel good. You stared into his gorgeous blue eyes, taken aback by how lively they looked. Before long, you realized you hadn't replied.

"I love you, too, Castiel." you answered, nuzzling into his chest. 

His smile was brighter than you had ever seen it. He laughed happily before kissing you one last time. Yeah, these were the moments you lived for.


End file.
